Things I Need to Do Before Peter Gets Here

He’ll be here in two weeks, so:

1. Thread my eyebrows. I am starting to look a lot like a wolverine is napping on my face.

2. Clean my room. There really isn’t room to swing a cat in here, let alone store my surly man friend.

3. Vajazzle. (Just kidding.)

4. Stock up on beverages, and then invent some kind of machine to make them colder than freezing, but also still liquid. Peter is quite picky about temperatures, and I don’t think he’ll ever be happy until he gets frostbite on his tongue from a drink.

5. Build a blanket fort and then tear it down, just to get it out of my system.

6. Practice my pouncing skills, so that I can wake him up with my patented Organ Smash. I like to pounce on him while he is asleep, and then crush him and yell, “HAPPY MORNING!” until he whimpers, “Ow, my organs!”

7. Come up with a list of animals for Peter to tell me bedtime stories about. Unlikely animal friendships are my favorite, and he is quite good at the story telling, but not great at choosing the right animals.

I should also probably finish planning our wedding and junk, but animal stories are way more important.

3 comments on “Things I Need to Do Before Peter Gets Here

  1. chellesh0ck says:

    1. If you get “vajazzled” as a hilarious joke surprise for Peter, I will be your BEST FRIEND FOREVER.
    2. Wait until Peter gets there and then do a fort together; Chris and I slept in a fort for about a month and it was da bomb.
    3. Is it still “ok” to say “da bomb” ?
    4. Can I PLEASE help you plan your wedding (is it in Perth?)

    • sicklyjoye says:

      1. I am hoping to save that for the wedding night,
      2. I will have to sort out somewhere both of us and a fort will fit, my house is only slightly larger than a dollhouse.
      3. It is always ok to say “da bomb”, particularly if you say “da bomb diggity”
      4. There will be one in Perth, but we are having a pretend one in July so my family and friends can see. But you can TOTALLY help me with the one in Perth, I will need it.

      • chellesh0ck says:


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