Real Women

I thought that people were over these things, but recently I saw quite a few people post them on Facebook again, and felt my blood boil. What I am referring to is images like these:

Additionally, this is a question, and should therefore end in a question mark and not a period. Bad grammar AND bad logic.

Protip: Wherever she lets you.

You get the idea. I’m not sure what these images were trying to achieve. I suspect they were intended to be body positive, and were an attempt to be subversive that went awry. At least, I hope that is what they were trying to do, because the alternative, that of trying to make thin girls feel badly about themselves, is intolerable.

Images like these and statements like, “Real women have curves!” are harmful. The last time I checked, the only qualifications for being a “real woman” were to have xx chromosomes, a vagina and/or identify as a woman. Putting one body type over another will always be wrong. This is not to say that having a personal preference is wrong. People are attracted to all sorts of different things. Saying that the way one person looks is inherently better than the way another looks is wrong though. It is a dangerous, hurtful viewpoint, and it has become very popular recently. Disguising it as another body type does not help.

If the tables were turned, and the images were talking about how thin women are the ideal type of women and that they are more attractive than other shapes of women, people would be up in arms. They would be discussing social constructs and media ideals and eating disorders. Those same things all apply to the images above. We cannot idolize any one shape if we want everyone to love themselves, because it is not realistic for everyone to be the same shape.

And that’s awesome, y’all.


8 comments on “Real Women

  1. chellesh0ck says:

    Fucking “A” …. I hate, HATE it when people go into overdrive with all that “real women have curves” shit. As a fat girl, (fat being purely an adjective without connotations, just like “tall” or “short”) I can only seeing it condoning body shaming for all body types. I can’t stand when people congratulate themselves on being body confident while saying “I’m sexier than the next girl because I have meat and she is a stick, men don’t want to fuck girls that look like 9 year olds” etc etc. That’s not being body confident, that’s trying to find reasons to put others down to make yourself feel better. It’s also called body snarking. The fact that thin privilege exists in our society does not give anyone license to comment on slender womens’ bodies while claiming that its fine to do so because they are “privileged by being thin”. That is exactly the same as “feminists” striving to slander men in order to gain the upper hand, “but its okay because men are privileged because they are men”. Both issues are about how there should be no issue, that body/gender diversity is normal and great, and should make no nevermind on a person’s life at all. I’ve had people enthusiastically tell me how I’m a “real woman unlike the sticks in magazines” as they sit back with this look of sheer smug-fuckery as if they deserve to be congratulated and given a motherfucking coronation because they think that they helped a fat girl feel good about herself. I always flatly reply with “there is nothing wrong with the women in magazines at all, unless you count the faceless magazine fuckwits that sit there editing them until they barely resemble themselves, and furthermore there is nothing wrong with me, so take your misinformed smarmy philanthropy elsewhere cos I’m fat and if you don’t shit up I’ll fucking sit on you, man.” haha. OK so maybe not the last bit but if given the chance again, I definitely will. Em you so hit the issue and people need to get over their own, and other peoples’ bodies, they are merely tools for us to live our lives in, and they are there to keep our bones and organs from spilling out. It blows my mind how something so functional and simple a concept, can be one of the largest social issues for humanity. EVERYONE is different. EVERYONE is a “real woman” if that’s what they identify as being. EVERYONE has the right to enjoy their bodies in whatever form they come in. Don’t even get me started on the governments and their ridiculous BMI body shaming ….. according to that thing, when I die, they will need to demolish a wall of my house to crane-lift me out of my chair (from which I have not moved in 4 years as my family feeds me fried food there) and then bury me in a piano crate. Its weird to think about myself as “super-morbidly obese” (yes, its a category, my BMI is 42) when I’m working out at the gym on a regular, “non-steel-enforced-special-obese-person” treadmill, or sitting in a single plane seat like a “normal person”, or having “regular-person sex” with my boyfriend without killing him with my truckloads of fat unhealthy morbidity. I can’t believe it took me, as a rational, intelligent person, the better part of 27 years to be able to let go of society’s bullshit about weight. But wait, don’t I get it? I’M FAT, THEREFORE I’M LAZY, STUPID AND UNHEALTHY, THERE’S AN OBESITY EPIDEMIC, DON’T YOU SEE??? ERMAGHERD MEHRCHELLLLLE YOU’RE THE WEEERST PEERRRSIIN EVUHHHHH, YEEERRRR GONNA GEHRT TERRRRP 2 DIERRRBEHTEEEES ANND DIEEEHHHHH EHHRRN 2 YEHHRRSS” But at least I’m a “real woman” because I have curves, right guys? right?
    Haha, sorry for that long rant Em. Love your work, keep it coming please!

    • sicklyjoye says:

      I love the rant. Also, according to the BMI scale, I am overweight. I am a smaller dress size than the majority of my whole country, but apparently, I am going to have a heart attack and DIE. Even the guy who invented the BMI scale didn’t mean for it to be used that way. Thanks for always having the best comments, that just made me laugh and laugh.

      • chellesh0ck says:

        Haha yeah its pretty mental aye – I’m glad you got a larf!!! I mean, you need to laugh as much as you can and squeeze the most out of life while you still can before your lard smothers your heart and you die, right? ahahaha. I really need to write a post, its been ages!!

  2. chellesh0ck says:

    Edit – I just checked and my BMI is actually 45.3 … It’s sure been nice knowing you Em, but I think that my knees will blow out and my heart will explode from all the pressure that my fatness places on my body before we meet again, so good luck in the future!
    Wear something sexy to my funeral though, Peter will need some cheering up I’m sure!!

  3. chellesh0ck says:

    PS I’m pretty sure that those are abs on Keira in that pic, not concentration camp ribs. So is it now now okay for women to feel good about their bodies if they are strong and fit, because some jealous body-snarking bitch says that they aren’t sexy? Gahhhhhh I hate everyone.

    • sicklyjoye says:

      NO because women with abs don’t have curves and might as well just be men. Fuck.

      • chellesh0ck says:

        “As a lady, one must be slender and delicate, however she must never show effort to attain her physique, she must appear soft and ladylike at all times. It is undesirable for a lady to perspire and possess muscular tone like that of a rabid dog. To be a lady is to always meet an impossible standard, and one must spend her life in apology for not meeting this ideal”

  4. emeeekay says:

    I LOVE THIS!! One of my best friends is stick-thin, borderline unhealthy. She just cannot put on weight, and she gets so much shit for it. She has called me borderline in tears, because she is just so sick of people telling her to “eat a cheeseburger”. It’s all just “poking fun”. Yet, if someone told me to do the opposite and lay off the cheeseburgers, most people would say I have every right to get upset. Not the skinny person, though, because that’s “funny”.

    TL;DR – Skinny people have feelings, too.

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